This week I have had a couple of conversations that really struck a chord with me. I figured that today would be a good day to share with you my thoughts on MY FAITH. As a disclaimer these are my thoughts and not the thoughts necessarily of my family, place of work or worship.
The question of how I would live my life if I truly believed what I say I do has haunted me for about a year now. I hate the fact that most of my life has been spend living more like a Pharisee and less like a disciple. I hate that I relay constantly on my own might and use God as a last means to fix my mistakes.
The first conversation I had been with my daughter who asked me if we were “Strict Christians” (her friend’s words). This statement is so North American. In Africa you are either saved or not. There are no wishy washy lukewarm Christian attitudes. My answer to Reagan was that I think that you either truly love Jesus or you don’t. I really want my kids to grow up not be rule follower but lovers of God. This is where we in my opinion as followers have put ourselves in a box. We get so caught up with following our Christian rules and trying our hardest to live the Christian dream that we forget about God. If I really believed that I am saved by God’s grace and not my own deeds, I wouldn’t care about following the rules. I would live my life with genuine gratitude to my Savoir. If I understood even a portion of the concept of the Grace of God I think that Love would come must easier. I say this because I know I lack love, which makes me judgemental and uncompassionate to others. I find it very easy to attack those who do not think or act as I do. But I sure do my best to defend my behaviour when someone (usually my husband) confronts me about it. I do not think I am alone in this. We as church goers put on our nice clothes and fake smiles and go into church pretending that everything is rosy. When was the last time I said that things SUCKED when asked by a Christian friend how I am? Do we tell other believers that our marriages are in trouble, our kids are struggling with addictions, or that we are in financial ruins? NO we don’t, because that would fall outside our perfect box. It might make others feel uncomfortable and they may even judge us. Now maybe this is my perception, and people are a lot more loving than I think. I hope this is the case. I want others to see Jesus in me not a Pharisee. I do not want to be a hypocrite. This leads into my second conversation.
Today was my dad’s birthday and we had some family over. The conversation turned to the fact that some of my family feels that Christians are hypocrites. The church is full of people who are judgemental, and think they are better than everyone else. Now I am not going to dispute that maybe their experience in a church body or with believers has obviously caused them to feel this way. What gets my goat is that they put the faults of imperfect men on a perfect God. Just because a believer treated you badly or acted in a way that was not God glorifying, does that mean that there is something wrong with God? No, but we blame him. I have seen so many people lose faith because they were feeling wronged by someone else. I wonder if this is has to do with that perfect box. We live our lives like everyone else, trying to build the perfect family, make the most money, and have the best job. We don’t live like God is the most important thing to us. We want God and..... And if we don’t get God and the perfect marriage, God and the nicest house we feel ripped off of the dream. We again don’t get Grace!! This is how I live. Doing my own thing, living my own life, and when it suits me I ask God for help, then blame him when things don’t go as I asked. Is this living like I believe I say I do?
In Africa people didn’t put on perfect clothes and perfect smiles, and walk into perfect churches. They go as they are. Sinners, people needing God. They prayed like I have never seen prayer before; literally hours of praying for the sick, the government, and the unsaved and on and on. They would not hesitate to get up in front of the church and ask for prayer for a hardship in their life. And I would venture to say that a majority of people would not be judgemental of that person, because in Africa everyone has hardships. Maybe that’s our problem; we never have to really rely on God. We seldom, if ever experience true hardships that require faith to get through.
So I guess my conclusion is that I want to live my life so that it is evident that God is more important than anything else. To open my life so that people see that I am not perfect and only saved by grace. To live a life in genuine gratitude and in love with Jesus. To love as Jesus loved, without judgement. How would you live if you truly believed what you say you do?
Sunday, June 6, 2010
Sunday, May 30, 2010
What this Mzungo Learned- Part 1
So we are going on day 4 of being home and Ja and I are stilling waking up at 4am. I don't know how much longer this can last, but I do not like it.
I am still trying to process what I seen in Uganda. It almost feels like a wonderful dream that I don't want to forget. These last couple days have been a struggle for me. I feel like I left my heart in Uganda. I know this seems like a real cliche thing to say but it is true. I loved everything about Africa.
It took us task oriented Canadians a little time to adjust to life in Uganda. To make the change in our minds that we were not there to build a building. The reality is that they didn't need us to build this clinic. We could have sent over the money that was raised and the people in the village are more than capable of doing it themselves. We were there to build relationship, to make friends.
Another thing we had to get used to was the fact that we would never be on time for anything. Relationships mean so much more to the people than any task or appointment they may have. Relationships take precedence over material things because they have very little. I think this is why the presence of God is so evident there. They don't have the "Material Gods" that we have here in North America. Everywhere we went people would make sure that we had a place to sit and a pop to drink. The great thing is that it was all very genuine.
As I have said before we were so blessed by the friends we made in Uganda. Douglas, Jackie, Raphael, Edgar, Paul and Phillip. I don't think I can put into words what a blessing they were to us. I do know for sure that our time in Uganda would have not been the same, or probably as meaningful without them. They all are really passionate about their country, people and what we are doing.
The one thing that did come naturally to the 13 of us was getting along. I was really worried that by the end of the 16 days we were going to be ready to kill each other. But God is great, and somehow sustained us. Everyone just seemed to find there own little part of what we where doing and run with it. I had so many interesting conversations on this trip, and had a lot of time to really process my thoughts on religion and my faith. I will tell you more about this in part 2.
So what did this Mzungo learn in Africa? I learned that I have a part to play in the world. I know now that I can help change the world, because doing something is better than doing nothing. I learned how important it is to have Hope and feel Loved. How much power there is in education and clean water. I think that the most important thing I learned is that we are all the same. People in Uganda love their kids and try to do the best they can with what they have. They may be poor, but I came home not feeling sorry for them. They have so many things figured out. If we could take the good things in both our societies and put them together we might get on the right track.
So where do we go from here? Well I will keep you posted. Thanks to the people that donated to this project so I could go. Please know that your donation did so much more than send an Alberta girl to Uganda. You are helping to change the world one village at a time.
I will be finishing Part 2 of my blog in the next couple of days. Please continue to read.
I am still trying to process what I seen in Uganda. It almost feels like a wonderful dream that I don't want to forget. These last couple days have been a struggle for me. I feel like I left my heart in Uganda. I know this seems like a real cliche thing to say but it is true. I loved everything about Africa.
It took us task oriented Canadians a little time to adjust to life in Uganda. To make the change in our minds that we were not there to build a building. The reality is that they didn't need us to build this clinic. We could have sent over the money that was raised and the people in the village are more than capable of doing it themselves. We were there to build relationship, to make friends.
Another thing we had to get used to was the fact that we would never be on time for anything. Relationships mean so much more to the people than any task or appointment they may have. Relationships take precedence over material things because they have very little. I think this is why the presence of God is so evident there. They don't have the "Material Gods" that we have here in North America. Everywhere we went people would make sure that we had a place to sit and a pop to drink. The great thing is that it was all very genuine.
As I have said before we were so blessed by the friends we made in Uganda. Douglas, Jackie, Raphael, Edgar, Paul and Phillip. I don't think I can put into words what a blessing they were to us. I do know for sure that our time in Uganda would have not been the same, or probably as meaningful without them. They all are really passionate about their country, people and what we are doing.
The one thing that did come naturally to the 13 of us was getting along. I was really worried that by the end of the 16 days we were going to be ready to kill each other. But God is great, and somehow sustained us. Everyone just seemed to find there own little part of what we where doing and run with it. I had so many interesting conversations on this trip, and had a lot of time to really process my thoughts on religion and my faith. I will tell you more about this in part 2.
So what did this Mzungo learn in Africa? I learned that I have a part to play in the world. I know now that I can help change the world, because doing something is better than doing nothing. I learned how important it is to have Hope and feel Loved. How much power there is in education and clean water. I think that the most important thing I learned is that we are all the same. People in Uganda love their kids and try to do the best they can with what they have. They may be poor, but I came home not feeling sorry for them. They have so many things figured out. If we could take the good things in both our societies and put them together we might get on the right track.
So where do we go from here? Well I will keep you posted. Thanks to the people that donated to this project so I could go. Please know that your donation did so much more than send an Alberta girl to Uganda. You are helping to change the world one village at a time.
I will be finishing Part 2 of my blog in the next couple of days. Please continue to read.
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Finally Home
Well the last few days have been exciting. On Sunday night we learned that British Airways went on strike. They had cancelled our flight home. We decided as a team that we needed to get closer to Kampala so that we would be available to take any flight that came up.
This plan was hard for many of us. We had in our minds that we would have a whole day to say our goodbyes and it was cut down to 2 hours. This made the emotional strain of saying bye to our new friends even more stressful.
We got on the bus and headed to Kampala where we spent the night at the same guesthouse. Long story short we got a flight Tuesday night to Amsterdam. A 7 hour layover in Amsterdam and then home. Some of us scored a business class seat the last flight which was awesome. I am a little jet lagged so I am going to cut this short, and finish my thoughts tomorrow. Chow!!
This plan was hard for many of us. We had in our minds that we would have a whole day to say our goodbyes and it was cut down to 2 hours. This made the emotional strain of saying bye to our new friends even more stressful.
We got on the bus and headed to Kampala where we spent the night at the same guesthouse. Long story short we got a flight Tuesday night to Amsterdam. A 7 hour layover in Amsterdam and then home. Some of us scored a business class seat the last flight which was awesome. I am a little jet lagged so I am going to cut this short, and finish my thoughts tomorrow. Chow!!
Sunday, May 23, 2010
Sunday
Yesterday we went to out on a day of well deserved R&R. We visited Bujagali falls and The Source of The Nile. It was a great day. Today a few of us took a Bodda Bodda ride to church. It ended up taking about 45 minutes on a dirt bike each way. By the time I got back to the bus I was covered in red shale from the road. It is funny that someone as up tight as me would get on a dirt bike driven by a stranger without a helmet and drive out in the middle of the bush. But when in Uganda...
Church today was an experience. We went to a very Pentecostal church. They preached the health and wealth prosperity. We heard a testimony of a lady who was badly malnutritioned. She had been to the hospital but did not have the money for treatment. I do not think she has more than couple days to live, but at this point is to sick to make it to the hospital. The belief is that she must not be saved or else God would have not made her sick. They must rid the demons of her and then she will be healed. . I can see how this philosophy spreads like wild fire here. People are extremely poor, many sick and uneducated. When a church only has 5 bibles and 10 people that are literate, people rely on what the pastor preaches. It is so engrained into the culture, just like polygamy. Most men have more than 1 wife and some more than 20 children.
After church the village held a little get together for us at the build site. We talked about what our plans are and took questions from people. Darrin had some pretty nice words to say about everyone, and then we socialized a bit. I have met 2 little girls that come every day to see me. Eliza and Jacinta are their names and they are about 5 years old. Today Jacinta’s mom told me that she cries everyday when I go home. That breaks my heart.
I am really sad to go home. I know I will be back because I am leaving a bit of my heart here. I have met some really good people and made good friends.
P.S. We just went halfers with Steve and bought a cow. Guess what they Ja and Steve named it. SID (hahaha). I don’t think it bald though.
Church today was an experience. We went to a very Pentecostal church. They preached the health and wealth prosperity. We heard a testimony of a lady who was badly malnutritioned. She had been to the hospital but did not have the money for treatment. I do not think she has more than couple days to live, but at this point is to sick to make it to the hospital. The belief is that she must not be saved or else God would have not made her sick. They must rid the demons of her and then she will be healed. . I can see how this philosophy spreads like wild fire here. People are extremely poor, many sick and uneducated. When a church only has 5 bibles and 10 people that are literate, people rely on what the pastor preaches. It is so engrained into the culture, just like polygamy. Most men have more than 1 wife and some more than 20 children.
After church the village held a little get together for us at the build site. We talked about what our plans are and took questions from people. Darrin had some pretty nice words to say about everyone, and then we socialized a bit. I have met 2 little girls that come every day to see me. Eliza and Jacinta are their names and they are about 5 years old. Today Jacinta’s mom told me that she cries everyday when I go home. That breaks my heart.
I am really sad to go home. I know I will be back because I am leaving a bit of my heart here. I have met some really good people and made good friends.
P.S. We just went halfers with Steve and bought a cow. Guess what they Ja and Steve named it. SID (hahaha). I don’t think it bald though.
Friday, May 21, 2010
A Day at A Ugandan Funeral
Today we worked until noon. We are ahead of schedule and everyone is tired, and some are starting to feel the affects of the sun. After lunch a few of us attended a funeral service of a friend of Edgar's who passed away 2 days ago in a car accident. The funeral was held at the families huts. When Edgar came to pick us up he told us that his friends brother had passed away from his injuries last night, and it is customary to bury the youngest first. So we attended a funeral service for a 3 year old named Jared today. When we arrived they stopped the service and moved us up to the front. They asked Steve to share a message, and then they buried the boy in the middle of the family's land. There where few tears and even some laughter. It seems that faith is very strong here. Death is not the end.
After that we went to take a blanket that a team members grandmother knitted to a family. When we arrived Edgar explained that the grandmother who was in her 80's had HIV. All 3 of her daughters had passed away from Aids, and her 5 grandkids that she is know taking care of all have HIV also. To make this situation even worse 2 of the kids have malaria. We were invited into her hut, which only had matts for sleeping on the ground and a clay pot to keep their food cold.
Today I am missing my kids, but am not ready to go yet. I think that I was meant to be here. I feel so at home, and at peace. I don't feel overwhelmed and sad, but very excited and hopeful of what is yet to come. We have the walls up on our medical center and will hopefully have a roof within the next 3 weeks.
So here is my challenge for all you at home. A few things to think about. A cow costs $75.00 and can change the lives of not only a family but a village. Education is needed so badly here. Text books, and other scholastic materials that in our country would be obsolete are invaluable here. Blankets, bibles, and first aid equipment are like gold. Please think about what your part in this could be.
We have made some really good friends, and have opportunities to do amazing things here. The Ugandans we have met here are a blessing from God. I can not say enough about how much they have done for us.
Please pray for a good day tomorrow as we take a well deserved break and fellowship together. Pray for health for our team members, and a good last couple of days.
After that we went to take a blanket that a team members grandmother knitted to a family. When we arrived Edgar explained that the grandmother who was in her 80's had HIV. All 3 of her daughters had passed away from Aids, and her 5 grandkids that she is know taking care of all have HIV also. To make this situation even worse 2 of the kids have malaria. We were invited into her hut, which only had matts for sleeping on the ground and a clay pot to keep their food cold.
Today I am missing my kids, but am not ready to go yet. I think that I was meant to be here. I feel so at home, and at peace. I don't feel overwhelmed and sad, but very excited and hopeful of what is yet to come. We have the walls up on our medical center and will hopefully have a roof within the next 3 weeks.
So here is my challenge for all you at home. A few things to think about. A cow costs $75.00 and can change the lives of not only a family but a village. Education is needed so badly here. Text books, and other scholastic materials that in our country would be obsolete are invaluable here. Blankets, bibles, and first aid equipment are like gold. Please think about what your part in this could be.
We have made some really good friends, and have opportunities to do amazing things here. The Ugandans we have met here are a blessing from God. I can not say enough about how much they have done for us.
Please pray for a good day tomorrow as we take a well deserved break and fellowship together. Pray for health for our team members, and a good last couple of days.
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Prayer Walk
Yesterday I got to go out for the afternoon with Steve Bateman and Edgar (the Chiefs son), to meet and pray with some of the people in the village. I meet grandmothers who took care of their orphaned grandkids, an elderly woman who has been bed ridden for 2 years, single moms, and a gentleman with Aids. Edgar says that the HIV rate in this village is about 60% for adults and 40% for kids. After a day of walking and talking with people all I wanted to do was have a shower, but when I got back to the guest house Ja was gone downtown. To have a shower here most days it requires pulling a bucket of water from the well, carrying it back to your room and sponge bathing. If you’re lucky it rains and you can shower outside. So I cried.
The days are long here. It seems like we have been here for a month. The sun is also kicking my butt. It gets close to 40 degrees every day. We come home eat, sleep and start all over again. Ja is so sunburnt that it is painful for him to move. The remarkable thing is that even with all of this we all are still feeling so fortunate to be here. We have made friends, and seen things that I don’t ever think I can explain.
I just got back from downtown with Ja and a couple of others. The streets of Busia are littered with trash; the landfill is right in the middle of town. Last week I saw small children picking through the trash. There are cows and goats all over the place, and literally thousands of people on the streets. To get around you take a bota bota, (bike taxi). You can use either a peddle bike or a motor bike. I have done it a few time and thankfully not crashed-no helmets. Most people here have not seen white people before. The kids sing Mzungo (one white person) or Wzungo (many white people) wherever you go. The smell is distinct and is everywhere, and the poverty is overwhelming. Most people live is mud huts, and sleep on grass mats on the ground. Kids wear the same clothes day after day, and play with sticks and garbage they find.
Everyone has seemed to have found where they fit into this equation we find ourselves in. Clothes and boots bought for the worker we have employed. Toys for children, blankets for orphans, hospital visits for the sick. I could go on and on about what I see people doing. I have got to see my husband and others in a new light. I have learned a lot about myself also. The biggest thing is that I have a new outlook on what my part in the world is. Doing something is better than doing nothing. There are so many opportunities as individuals, families, churches, and schools to change the lives of people in Africa or even at home. I will not forget what God has taught me here, I can’t.
Please pray for the health of our team. We are all tired and the elements are starting to ware on us. Also please pray as we attend a funeral tomorrow for a local boy who died in an accident yesterday. Pray that we might be an encouragement to him and his family and support for Edgar. Also good conversation. (We played bible trivia at supper tonight!! ) Thanks for your prayers.
Some of you are probalbly wondering how I get internet when we have no power. Douglas (Sophie's son) is an IT Tech and has provided us with wireless internet that works when we have generator power.
The days are long here. It seems like we have been here for a month. The sun is also kicking my butt. It gets close to 40 degrees every day. We come home eat, sleep and start all over again. Ja is so sunburnt that it is painful for him to move. The remarkable thing is that even with all of this we all are still feeling so fortunate to be here. We have made friends, and seen things that I don’t ever think I can explain.
I just got back from downtown with Ja and a couple of others. The streets of Busia are littered with trash; the landfill is right in the middle of town. Last week I saw small children picking through the trash. There are cows and goats all over the place, and literally thousands of people on the streets. To get around you take a bota bota, (bike taxi). You can use either a peddle bike or a motor bike. I have done it a few time and thankfully not crashed-no helmets. Most people here have not seen white people before. The kids sing Mzungo (one white person) or Wzungo (many white people) wherever you go. The smell is distinct and is everywhere, and the poverty is overwhelming. Most people live is mud huts, and sleep on grass mats on the ground. Kids wear the same clothes day after day, and play with sticks and garbage they find.
Everyone has seemed to have found where they fit into this equation we find ourselves in. Clothes and boots bought for the worker we have employed. Toys for children, blankets for orphans, hospital visits for the sick. I could go on and on about what I see people doing. I have got to see my husband and others in a new light. I have learned a lot about myself also. The biggest thing is that I have a new outlook on what my part in the world is. Doing something is better than doing nothing. There are so many opportunities as individuals, families, churches, and schools to change the lives of people in Africa or even at home. I will not forget what God has taught me here, I can’t.
Please pray for the health of our team. We are all tired and the elements are starting to ware on us. Also please pray as we attend a funeral tomorrow for a local boy who died in an accident yesterday. Pray that we might be an encouragement to him and his family and support for Edgar. Also good conversation. (We played bible trivia at supper tonight!! ) Thanks for your prayers.
Some of you are probalbly wondering how I get internet when we have no power. Douglas (Sophie's son) is an IT Tech and has provided us with wireless internet that works when we have generator power.
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
We are Buildling
It’s been a busy couple of days. We went to church on Sunday morning. A traditional Pentecostal service. The praying and singing was amazing. After the service our EMR’s bandaged some cuts and we send one little girl to the hospital (paying for the visit and antibiotics). We then took a drive and went to visit Sophie’s mom in another village.
The last two days we have gone hog wild on the building. We have about 5 feet up already. We wake up at 5 or 5:30 when the Muslims call for prayer on a mega phone. We have breakfast and off to the site by 7:00. The last 2 days we have worked until about 4 then the RAIN comes. Since we don’t have any water the torrential down pour has become our outdoor shower. No joke. We all take our soap out on the deck and shower.
The medical need here is so great. A lady came up to Ja today and wanted us to look at her baby. The child had a laceration on her foot, and it was infected. One of our team took them to the hospital, and it turns out that worms had entered the wound and now she was sick. We have seen this over and over.
Please pray for us as we continue to work. It is about 40 degrees every day, and so far not one has gotten sick. We each have met people and seen needs in different places. Please pray that the Lord would continue to bring these needs forth and that we would be able to provide. With the long work days, no power or water, we are all surprisingly still in high spirits. Please pray that we would continue to get along and that God will be glorified in all we do.
PS. We love you girls. Sorry we have not been able to call, hopefully soon. Love Mom and Dad!!!!
The last two days we have gone hog wild on the building. We have about 5 feet up already. We wake up at 5 or 5:30 when the Muslims call for prayer on a mega phone. We have breakfast and off to the site by 7:00. The last 2 days we have worked until about 4 then the RAIN comes. Since we don’t have any water the torrential down pour has become our outdoor shower. No joke. We all take our soap out on the deck and shower.
The medical need here is so great. A lady came up to Ja today and wanted us to look at her baby. The child had a laceration on her foot, and it was infected. One of our team took them to the hospital, and it turns out that worms had entered the wound and now she was sick. We have seen this over and over.
Please pray for us as we continue to work. It is about 40 degrees every day, and so far not one has gotten sick. We each have met people and seen needs in different places. Please pray that the Lord would continue to bring these needs forth and that we would be able to provide. With the long work days, no power or water, we are all surprisingly still in high spirits. Please pray that we would continue to get along and that God will be glorified in all we do.
PS. We love you girls. Sorry we have not been able to call, hopefully soon. Love Mom and Dad!!!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)